Sleep DOES help!

Friday, October 8, 2010

Have you been reading the medical articles on CNN recently that explain how if you don't get enough sleep you can't lose weight because important metabolic activities are being delayed or blocked by the lack of sleep?

Yeah, apparently they're correct. Because I've been sleeping like a log all week (we have release weekend coming up, so Xanax is my friend), and not only has all of the water weight from the Crimson Tide dropped right off, but I'm heading back downwards in overall weight as well.

Finally. So, sleep = necessary = good.

WEIGHT: 308.2

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 1 SB meal bar, a couple of salt and pepper potato chips

Monday's Weight

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

309 pounds. At 8:00 am. I ask you.

FOOD FOR THE DAY: SB meal bar, Thai chicken wrap, small Greek salad, large cup of cut up fruit, peanut butter sandwich, Weight Watchers ice cream bar.

Yes, I'm still training

Sunday, September 26, 2010

I haven't been posting much here because to be honest, I've been absolutely frustrated with the way I swelled up as of 9/10 and pretty much stayed somewhere between 312-313 for two weeks. I can tell it's water weight because of the way my feet look and the way my gut goes drum-tight -- and as far as my doctor can tell it's hormone-related because my body doesn't really want to be and apart from a Lasix IV there's not a damned thing I can do about it. I can cut out the salt, drink water all day long, chug minerals meant to balance my electrolytes, take OTC diuretics (and enjoy the racing heart and panic attacks that come with those), and nothing fucking works. Needless to say, it's a bit fucking discouraging, and while I know I should woman up and keep posting, to be honest the weight gain was just humiliating. It would be nice to say I just trained on through it, but to be honest it's extraordinarily uncomfortable when I swell up like that, which makes it hard to work out. I still got to the gym, just not every day, and not as enthusiastically as I would have liked.

The swelling going down now, which is good. I have no idea why, but it's going down. And today's Cheat Day, so I indulged with a Five Guys burger -- go me. And now, off to the gym.

WEIGHT: 310.4 pounds

FOOD FOR THE DAY: a single patty Five Guys burger, 3/4 of a regular order of fries, 1 Weight Watchers toffee crunch ice cream bar, 1 PB sandwich, 1 cup carb controlled yogurt.

I didn't even worry about the weekend

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

As it was a con, and it's pointless to do anything but be at the con. But today, it's back to normal with a nice workout at the gym (a woman was on the bike, so I hopped on one of the ellipticals, which kicked my ass but good)

WEIGHT: 312.0

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 2 peanut butter sandwiches, 2 servings of organic guacamole corn chips, 1 avocado roll, 1 spider roll, 2 pieces each of cooked egg and cooked shrimp, 1 order of lemon chicken, 3 forkfuls of steamed rice, 4 spoonfuls of egg drop soup, a handful of grapes, one slice of pizza.

Oh, dear Jesus

Friday, September 17, 2010

Why am I allergic to being a female? My period comes, and I load up enough water to survive a trek across the Sahara. My fertile period shows up, and I swell like a balloon. You do not want to know what my feet look like right now. I swear to God I was supposed to be a guy, and something went seriously wrong along the way...

WEIGHT: 311.6

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 2 slices of sugar-free whole wheat bread, 2 tbs of hummus, Thai chicken wrap, 1 sm cup cucumber/tomato salad, 1 lg cup fruit salad, sweet and sour shrimp/chicken, noodles, egg drop soup, sesame chicken, barbecue chicken, 1 chicken roll, 1 sm cup tapioca, 2 almond cookies, 1 liver sausage sandwich.

Wow

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Writing is good, but it does bloat me like nobody's business. And so, back to the gym tonight for weights and 30 minutes on the bike.

WEIGHT: 310.8

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 2 tortillas with hummus, 1 Thai chicken wrap, one small cucumber/tomato salad, one large fruit cup, 1 Weight Watchers ice cream bar, 1 liversausage sandwich, 2 servings of Stacy's garlic & parmesan pita chips.

Sorry

Friday, September 10, 2010

I've gotten sucked into fiction creation this week in a big bad way, so I've been bad about posting (and going to the gym, to be honest -- that has to stop tomorrow). I did try to swim tonight, but the pool water was freaking cold. I'll probably need to start turning on the heater for an hour in the evenings, now.

Interestingly, the aversion to fast food seems to be continuing -- we had a horrendous rainstorm yesterday so I didn't feel like leaving the building for lunch, and when I got down to the cafeteria I could smell hamburgers, so I thought I'd try one.

Um...no. Blech. Mediocre meat, wilted produce, overtoasted bun. Even the fries were just kind of nasty. Today I had my usual chicken Thai wrap with a small cucumber/tomato/onion salad and large fruit cup for dessert, which was much better. Mind you, I still adore Five Guys hamburgers and fries, so I think it's not so much a growing distaste for burgers and fries as it is for *mediocre* burgers and fries. Which is not a bad thing, if you think about it.

I think I'm doing sushi for lunch tomorrow.

WEIGHT: 307.8

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 2 SB meal bars, one chicken Thai wrap, a small cup of cucumber/tomato salad, a large cup of cut fruit, 1 peanut butter sandwich, 1 oz. of Hotch chili con queso popcorn, 1 sugar free strawberry Jello cup.

Oh, look

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Here comes the Crimson Tide. So much for swimming.

WEIGHT: 307.6

FOOD FOR THE DAY: Two brisket taco fillings, guacamole, fresh corn chips, salsa, 1 Weight Watchers ice cream bar, 1 peanut butter sandwich, 1 chocolate/PB protein shake.

It's a glorious day out there

Saturday, September 4, 2010

And as soon as I'm sure this kind of weather is going to last, I'm taking the bike in for an overhaul and getting it out on the bike paths. Woohoo!

More weights last night in addition to 30 minutes on the bike, and I made a discovery -- this whole eating healthily lark has pretty much ruined fast food for me. I was absolutely starving yesterday morning and didn't have time to wait for something cooked, so I grabbed a bag of Doritos to add to my bagel. And they were horribly salty, with an unpleasantly dry, cardboardy consistency and just generally yucky. Last night, I was hungry after my workout so I figured what the hell, I'll grab a medium serving of french fries from Burger King when I get my treat Diet Coke (yeah, yeah, I know -- I still want it, so suck it). And the fries tasted moderately rancid, overly salted once again and generally cruddy.

The hell? Am I going vegetarian next?

WEIGHT: 306.2

FOOD FOR YESTERDAY: 1 poppy seed bagel with regular cream cheese, 1 sm bag Doritos, 1 avocado roll, 1 spider roll, 2 pcs cooked shrimp sushi, 2 pcs cooked egg sushi, 2 Weight Watchers ice cream bars, 1 peanut butter sandwich, 1 small portion of fries, 1 cup sugar free jello.

FOOD FOR THIS DAY: A variety of sushi (Osaka), half a medium bag of popcorn (the movies, shared with Lyndon), grilled whitefish with lump crabmeat and hollandaise sauce, a handful of french fries (Ralph and Kacoo's), 1 Weight Watchers toffee ice cream bar.

Ow. Ow ow ow.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Added the weights back in last night, and I can feel it this morning. On the one hand, doing weights is a good thing for me because it builds yummy, yummy muscle tissue and makes me stronger in every way.

On the other hand, I would gladly kill for a Vicodin and three extra hours of sleep this morning. Having this weird allergy issue isn't helping with that, either -- waking up coughing at least twice a night kinda screws with your REM sleep. It's also affecting my eating habits -- still haven't started back on the fast food, but I've been tempted a number of times since last weekend so it's time to nip that particular temptation in the bud. Tonight -- a good, solid food shop is in my future.

WEIGHT: 309.0

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 1 SB meal bar, one thai chicken wrap, one small cup of cucumber/onion salad, one large cup of cut-up fruit, 1 Weight Watchers ice cream bar, 3 pieces of sugar-free walnut bread, 1 peanut butter sandwich.

Well, that was...a week

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

During which I got moderately better, went to Armadillocon, ate stuff that wasn't the best in the world for me (but I did work out in the hotel gym on Friday night, so go me), came home and launched into writing a short story and trying to handle my allergies. And as of tonight, I'm back in the gym on a regular basis, whee!

WEIGHT: 309.0

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 2 Weight Watchers toffee ice cream bars, 1 breadstick, 1 bowl of zuppa toscana, 1 individual 8" pizza, 1 peanut butter sandwich, 1 chocolate and PB protein shake.

Still sick

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Since yesterday's pigout and water swilling did bubkes, according to the scale (on the upside, this is the lowest weight I've been at in years). I feel feverish, achy and yucky, and I just want to go back to bed.

So I am.

WEIGHT: 306.8

FOOD FOR THE DAY: Nothing yet -- no real appetite. Maybe a protein shake in a bit.

Oh. That's why.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

I'm sick. So's my boss, apparently.

I tried to do a bike ride last night, almost fell off after 15 minutes, woke up this morning feeling like I'd been beaten all night. Am currently drinking as much water as I can choke down, and took a C and two Ds. Exercise is cancelled for tonight.

WEIGHT: 307.6

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 10 oz steak, 1 handful french fries, 3 shrimp, 2 pieces of bread, a small caesar salad, a grande nonfat mocha frap, two scrambled eggs, 5 oz steak from a t-bone, half a hashed brown serving, 3 pancakes, and God help the person who gives me shit about it right now because I wanted something hot and IHOP was the only thing open at 11:30 PM, okay?

I've had seven hours of sleep

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

A little more, even -- went to bed around 9:30 PM last night (rest day, after all), woke up this morning around 5:00 AM. So why am I still tired?

My brain hates me.

At least getting up at Oh My God It's Early meant I got into the office early, which means I get to leave early, so I'll have time to do a bunch of stuff (guitar practice, editing, working on a sewing project and putting together Episode 117) this afternoon/evening before the gym. I may not like this kind of schedule, but it does allow for a lot of achievement.

WEIGHT: 307.6

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 2 scrambled eggs w/salsa, 2 pieces of bacon, a hashed brown patty and two pieces of toast (yeah, yeah, I know -- I was also freaking starving), a Thai chicken wrap, a cup of fruit salad, a Barq's Root Beer, a low-fat beef hot dog, 2 Vietnamese spring rolls, one bowl of pho.

What do I want?

Sunday, August 22, 2010

I've been thinking about that in the last couple of days, especially since I've been harping on my weight instead of my improving levels of fitness, which is the actual goal here. And my levels are definitely improving -- not only are the increasing times and levels I'm doing on the bike and in the pool demonstrating that, but I'm starting to see definition in my forearms and calves that's thrilling me to the bone. Even my upper arms and thighs are changing shape, and while my trunk is always the last to show any changes, I think I'm starting to see a couple of hints of muscle buildup there, too. By the time the triathlon rolls around, I will (please God) be ready for it.

I will also still be considered obese by the medical community, since I probably won't be anywhere below 250 pounds by then (BMI? Can kiss my ass -- weightlifters are considered obese by BMI measurements, which tells you something about that particular measurement). But that's okay, because the goal here isn't to lose weight -- it's to put on muscle, extend my stamina, and be able to successfully compete in an indoor triathlon. Any weight loss is, to be honest, just a pleasant fringe benefit.

That being said, I would be lying if I said I didn't like the idea of eventually, maybe, being just the tiniest bit ripped. Not slender (I suspect that's genetically impossible, nor do I particularly want that body shape), but lean, strong and muscular, like, oh, Gabrielle Reece:


Now, can I achieve a shape like this in my mid-40s? I don't know, even with plastic surgery to take in the excess skin (although Becky Griggs has made it very clear that it's not impossible). But hell, if I could get at least within spitting distance of a shape like this, I would be thrilled out of my gourd.

But I'm not trying to pay much attention to that at the moment -- right now, the immediate goal is to perform a 10-minute swim and a 30-minute biking session consecutively. That's hella more important than looking nice in a tank top.

Well, lookee there!

Added weights to the workout last night, and all of a sudden le plateau c'est cracked. Granted, I also didn't get up until noon or so, but still.

And today is Cheat Day, so since I pretty much splurged at the Cheesecake Factory on their Crispy Chicken Sandwich (oh, God, I do believe I would eat Spam willingly if it was covered with chipotle mayo), I may wind up doing leg weights tonight as well as bumping up the bike program to 5. It's still bitching hot out there, so I'm going to skip the swimming until later this week when the temps are supposed to drop down into more bearable levels. I keep this up, and running won't be that far off -- whee!

WEIGHT: 307.6

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 3 pieces of French bread with butter, a crispy coated chicken breast, chipotle mayo, french fries, a grande nonfat Starbucks mocha frappuccino with a shot of hazelnut, 1 liver sausage sandwich, 2 dill pickle slices.

The plateau continues

Friday, August 20, 2010

Which really, REALLY means more protein and weights, plus a touch more water, methinks. I should have done weights last night, but I stalled at home (I discovered the SHERLOCK fanfic community on LiveJournal and got sucked in, dammit) and wound up only having enough time to cycle (although I did bump the cycling program up to level 6 for a couple of minutes, until the burn got to be too bad and I dialed it back to 5. Got off the bike and woo, I could feel those extra levels). Tonight, I'm getting to the gym by 10:00 PM at the very latest -- a full hour should give me enough time on the bike AND the iron.

Looking back on it, I'm not really surprised at the plateau -- this has been a very stressful week, and we all know the effects of stress on Melanie's cortisol levels. The fact that I haven't ballooned up a couple or five pounds from retained water is, frankly, amazing, as is the fact that I haven't dived face-first into a plate full of comfort food despite the temptation. And oh, boy, there was temptation.

But now it's the weekend in a half hour for me -- in addition to editing and maybe taking in a movie or two with the Bodacious Brit, there is housework and (if the weather isn't too horrendous) yardwork in my future, which should have a pleasant effect on my stamina.

WEIGHT: 308.6

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 2 SB meal bars, 3 large chunks of roasted chicken, a scoop each of tabouleh, hummus and potato chunks, 1 floret of roasted cauliflower, a small portion of Greek salad, 3 starlight mints, 1 liver sausage sandwich, 2 dill pickle spears, 1 Weight Watchers English toffee ice cream bar.

I seem to be plateauing a bit

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Weight's been pretty much the same for the last 3-4 days, which one on hand is good -- the bod is consolidating the recent losses and finding a new stabilization point.

On the other hand, I probably need to add more protein to the diet, and step up the exercise, which means heavier weights and more time in the pool. I'm up to 24 laps in the pool, and yesterday's walk was my first time moving my own mass around on land (since I'm doing an indoor triathlon it's okay that I train on gym bikes, but there really is a huge difference between spinning and actually moving your own mass around on a bike).

WEIGHT: 308.2

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 1 SB meal bar, 1 Thai chicken wrap, 1 cup fruit salad (strawberries, melon, pineapple, kiwi, no syrup), 1 small caesar salad.

We have met stress, and kicked it right in the 'nads

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

I was not looking forward to today at all, because I knew it was going to be frantic, hectic, and a couple of other words ending in -tic due to things involving me wearing metaphoric white armor and carrying a blaster. I also knew that getting lunch at the regular time would probably not be happening due to said activities.

Before now, this would have resulted in me pounding down enough sugar to send a rhino into a diabetic coma just to handle the day, and feeling absolutely run down and lousy as a result. So I planned ahead -- I ate my meal bar first thing in the morning, then indulged in a walnut muffin mid-morning because I was going to damn well need the carbs by 2:00 PM. Which I did, as it turned out, but as a result of said carbs I did not have a meltdown, threaten to stab anyone or grab a couple of beers from the fridge and pop the emergency exit slide, so that was all good.

After the inital crisis was over, I had my usual thai chicken wrap and salad (cucumber/tomato/onion this time, and I have no idea where they get their tomatoes from but the damn things literally taste like plastic -- eurgh) for a late lunch, then came home after more work and had a couple of peanut butter sandwiches and an ounce of the yummy spicy popcorn for dinner. I may well have a protein shake as well later on, I don't know. I do know that I feel a heck of a lot better than I have after previous days like this.

That's all well and good, Mel, you point out, but don't you think you're overdoing it on the food a little in reaction to the stress? Actually, no -- having taken a look at my food intake yesterday (see, there's a REASON why I write everything down), I realized that I'd brought my calorie intake down a little too low by 600 calories or so. Yes, it's possible to bring your calorie intake down too low, especially if you're working out at the same time -- your body tends to think there's a famine going on and goes into lockdown mode. So today I stayed pretty much right around my target caloric intake, and I can feel the difference in my mood and energy level.

In fact, I was feeling so spandy, I went for a rather lovely walk, as we had something of a sprinkle here that did a nice job of cooling the temps down to reasonable levels (I mean, it's 8:30 PM and it's already down to 90 F -- that's just crazy cool). Since I could go outside without melting, I strolled around the neighborhood for a bit, checked out the local park and bike trails, then hightailed it home and set up the sprinkler in our front yard (which I have to go move in a bit).

This is a huge improvement on being curled in a fetal ball, let me tell you.

WEIGHT: 308.2

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 1 SB meal bar, a banana walnut muffin, a Thai chicken wrap, a small cucumber/tomato/onion salad, 2 peanut butter sandwiches with homemade marmalade, 1 oz. of Hotch chili con queso popcorn.

Is my hair on fire?

Monday, August 16, 2010

Or am I just running around like it is?

Oy. At least Saturday was wonderful. I keep trying to reconnect with how I felt then.

WEIGHT: 308.2

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 1 SB meal bar, 1 thai chicken wrap, 1 banana, 1 small caesar salad, 1 peanut butter sandwich, 2 clemetines, 1 handful of grapes

Well, look at that

Sunday, August 15, 2010

WEIGHT: 308.0

And that's after yesterday's sushifest. I'm good with that. As well as Cheat Day, I'm also taking today as my break day instead of tomorrow so that I can convince my brain to shut down at a reasonable time (work tomorrow, you see). The fact that I spent about 20 minutes out in some truly filthy heat trimming back the hedge hiding the pool pump so that a repair guy could come in and fix the pump motor that apparently went blooey may have had something to do with it, as well.

FOOD FOR THE DAY: Five Guys burger and regular fries, peanut butter sandwich, 1 oz. Hotch chili con queso popcorn, 4 clementines, handful of grapes, and one PB/chocolate protein shake.

Video Post 04: Saturday In The Pool With Melanie

Saturday, August 14, 2010

I really need to take Chlor-Trimeton more often

Because when I get sniffly and stuffed up from my allergies, I can't hear squat, and as a result I couldn't hear exactly what the waitress at Genroku was asking me after I gave her my sushi order (1 spider roll, 1 avocado roll, 2 pieces each of egg and cooked shrimp). I thought she was saying, "Are you sure you want the separate sushi pieces," to which I nodded yes because I was ferociously hungry.

A few minutes later, I get a platter with my spider roll, avocado roll...and 4 pieces of egg and shrimp sushi respectively. Turns out one order includes two pieces. Oh. Okay, good to know (and I bought some more Chlor-Trimeton later when I did the food shopping. Stupid sinuses).

But that's okay, because I did a training swim this afternoon (been away from the pool too long due to the heat -- bad triathlete, no new gear), and tonight is biking and weightlifting, plus some housecleaning I have scheduled for this evening. And besides, Genroku sushi is da bomb.

WEIGHT: 308.2 (Yeah, yeah. I'll be impressed when I drop below 306.9.)

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 1 spider roll, 1 avocado roll, 4 pieces each of egg and cooked shrimp sushi, a peanut butter sandwich, 1 oz. of Hotch chili con queso popcorn, 2 clementines, five chocolate-covered espresso beans, 1 chocolate/PB protein shake, 2 pieces of teriyaki beef jerky, and a handful of grapes.

The Process of Cravings

Friday, August 13, 2010

Okay, so the fact that I didn't have breakfast and ate a relatively small lunch added to various other stressors have awoken a desire. Namely, a desire to go to Starbuck's and order a grande Tazo green tea blended creme drink.

Not the healthiest thing in the world, true. But I can leave off the whipped cream and have it made with nonfat milk, I tell myself, and that's only 290 calories. With 67 grams of carbs, true, which would comprise close to a quarter of the usual carbs in a 2,000 cal diet, but still...

This, my friends, is where I use psychology to its fullest advantage. I have a Cheat Day where I can eat and drink pretty much anything I like -- my Cheat Day is Sunday, two days away. So I study this craving and think, "Yeah, that would taste really good. And I'll get myself one...on Sunday. In the meantime, I need to address the fact that I'm hungry, the cafeteria is closed and I'm stuck here for another 2.5 hours without cash for the vending machines. Where can I get something quick, tasty and at least relatively healthy?"

Going out to get something is an option, but we're pretty much surrounded by fast food joints and I just can't choke down a fast food salad, I'm sorry. A fast rummage through my purse, however, and SCORE -- I have just enough change to get a bag of light butter popcorn from the machines. Once again, not the healthiest thing in the world, but a huge improvement over PopTarts and it'll hold me until I get home to the food in my fridge.

And now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get my snack on.

The morning after

My ass is still complaining about the bike ride last night, but my legs feel amazing. One of the cool things about regular exercise is that it sucks donkey gonads when you start doing it (and yeah, it continues to suck when you're tired, stressed or just not in the mood to get to the gym), but once you settle into a routine, you really do get this burst of endorphins that make you feel damn good about yourself. You may be dripping sweat and aching in places you never thought you'd ache directly after the exercise, but there's this sneaky little internal cheer of "Hell yeah -- go me!" that makes you grin even as you limp to the shower.

WEIGHT: 309.8

FOOD FOR THE DAY: 3/4 of a caesar salad and 3/4 of an 8" pepperoni pan pizza (team-building lunch, so I figured what the hell, and I STILL couldn't finish the damn pizza), 1 bag of light butter popcorn, 1 peanut butter sandwich, 1 oz. Hotch chili con queso popcorn, 1 Weight Watchers English toffee crunch ice cream bar.

Ow.

Just did 30 minutes on the regular bike, and I would kill for a chamois. Up until now I've been using the reclining bike, but I figure I'll have to use a regular exercise cycle for the indoor triathlon, so I may as well suck it up and start riding on that.

And yes, my butt bones are killing me. But I still did a full 30 minutes and I can feel the difference in my legs from the reclining bike, so that kicks ass.

FOOD FOR THE DAY: A poppy seed bagel with cream cheese, a Thai chicken wrap, a large fruit cup (pineapple, melon, strawberry, no syrup), one banana, a chicken caesar salad with two chicken breasts and three teaspoons of Marie's caesar salad dressing, one helping of chocolate-covered espresso beans (I know, I know, but it's 120 calories and they're YUMMY), and four pieces of teriyaki beef jerky.

Hee, hee, hee...

Thursday, August 12, 2010

WEIGHT: 310.8

And gosh, the Crimson Tide is over, plus I did the usual riding/weightlifting combo last night. Hands up of people who are surprised? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

So the downward trend recommences, and I've decided what my goal/reward is, because it's much easier for me to work towards something concrete that I REALLY want. And in this case, I want a day off where I don't have to do anything.

As soon as the scale reads 299.9, I will be scheduling a lovely day for myself, during which I may well find a nice spa somewhere and get a facial, manicure, massage, or something pampering like that. Woohoo!

Video Post 03

See?

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

311.6 as of this morning, and I had three boneless pork chops and a can of corn for dinner, then was so damn tired that I just went to bed instead of hitting the gym. Which seems to show that you really do need sleep as well as good nutrition and exercise.

FOOD FOR THE DAY: SB bar for breakfast, and sushi (a spider roll, an avocado roll, two pieces of omelette, two pieces of cooked shrimp and one piece of squid) and two small scoops of green tea ice cream for lunch. I love sushi, but I'm always hungry a couple of hours later, and today isn't any different.

Somewhat bummed

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Over a bunch of little things, none of which I can really do anything about at the moment, but they're aggregating to a level that really aggravates me (and yes, I did that deliberately -- isn't it pretty?).

Of course, the Crimson Tide's habit of carbonating hormones isn't helping things any, nor is the fact that I drank a ton of water yesterday in an attempt to keep my throat wet and non-irritated (stupid allergies) and promptly added another pound as a result. It's water weight -- I KNOW it's water weight. It will come off on Thursday. But in the meantime it's like, "Really? I really need this now?"

Nonetheless, I hit the gym last night and did 40 minutes on the bike, so booyah for me, and tonight should be biking, weights and maybe a swim if the water cools off at all. I wish people actually read this so that someone would kinda slap me upside the head and say, "Oh, get over yourself, Mel -- you're sticking to the exercise and you're eating reasonably. Everything will be fine."

What I really need...is a treat, something to look forward to (and work towards). Maybe a clothes spree once I hit 300? A day off? Must think about this a bit...

WEIGHT: 312.4

FOOD FOR THE DAY: A SB meal bar for breakfast, and three chunks of chicken, a scoop of roasted potato chunks, a scoop of tabouleh, a scoop of hummus, and two pieces of roasted cauliflower for lunch.

Viva Las Vegas!

Monday, August 9, 2010

And oh, we had a great time -- spent a chunk of time out at Hoover Dam and Lake Mead, walked around the Strip, walked around the Bellagio (that place is practically a small city -- walking around it is no small shakes), saw some great shows and generally relaxed and enjoyed ourselves.

And I'm pretty happy with the way I was eating over the weekend -- I did my best to stick with reasonably acceptable food (I originally wrote 'reasonably healthy', then realized that scrambled eggs, steak, and margaritas probably don't fall in that category). Yes, there was a bounce in weight, but I also started my period on Saturday morning, and I always swell up like a sponge during the Crimson Tide (plus, ahem, *output* has slowed to a crawl). It'll come off in two days.

I also learned something interesting yesterday. As 1) it was Cheat Day, 2) we were running around like maniacs trying to get to the Luxor to see the Titanic exhibit before getting on the plane, and 3) the both of us were starving, I indulged in a crispy chicken sandwich and fries from the Luxor McDonald's for breakfast, and half a burger and half an order of curly fries from an airport restaurant. I was only able to finish half an order because after three weeks of eating decent food, fast food is really sort of gross. Both the chicken sandwich and burger were tasteless and overly greasy, and even my beloved fries were...eh. To add insult to injury, my stomach got moderately upset after the McDonald's, and I felt bloated and gassy for the rest of the day. By the time we got home, I slugged down a protein shake with gratitude.

So, fast food -- ultimately, pretty yucky. The bag of peanut M&Ms I shared with Lyndon, however, were fabulous (well, it IS chocolate, you know).

WEIGHT: 311.2

FOOD FOR THE DAY: Breakfast was a SB meal bar, lunch was a Thai chicken wrap and a small Caesar salad. I think I may well thaw out some steak tonight and have that with a salad for dinner, and some clementines for dessert.

Phoo

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Today we went out to Hoover Dam. Didn't take the indoor tour because we were carrying stuff too big for the security requirements, so we just walked around outside taking pictures and video for about 45 minutes. In 107 F temps. Yeah. Mind you, we brought plenty of water, but we were still a bit wrung out by the time we got back to the hotel, so my food intake isn't quite what it should have been.

But what the hell -- it's Vegas, baby.

WEIGHT: 310.4

FOOD FOR THE DAY: part of that lime-chipotle stark salad from yesterday, three eggs, a 6 oz. steak, a couple of forkfuls of hashed browns, a piece of white toast, a medium chocolate shake from DQ (won't apologize for it -- I was dying for something sweet and cold after we got off of the dam), 2 squares of Bellagio chocolate, a grilled chicken breast with cherry tomatoes, lettuce, Cole slaw and a piece of bread. Oh, and a banana strawberry coconut smoothies with breakfast. And it was all yummo.

Waking up in Vegas

Which will happen tomorrow. In the meantime, I have had a great time wandering around the strip, and I keep swilling water because it's 107 degrees F. And the two margaritas, but we won't talk about those right now.

WEIGHT: 308.8

FOOD FOR THE DAY: one bag of cranberry nut mix, one granola bar, one small chicken Caesar salad, a slice of beef, swordfish, pork, duck, turkey, two Cali roll pieces, seaweed salad and pickled Ginger for dinner, a piece of sugar-free cheesecake, and a few bites of lime-chipotle salad with grilled steak.

In the arms of Morpheus (no, not Laurence Fishburne)

Thursday, August 5, 2010

The Bodacious Brit came by my desk today, as he often does, and said, "After we get back from Vegas, how about we have someone come and clean the ductwork? Because I woke up this morning feeling like I'd been beaten."

I said it sounded like a plan to me, especially since the guy across the street runs a company that does this (I'm all about supporting my local folks) and God knows when, if ever, the ducts have been cleaned in this place. I do know that we get horrendous amounts of dust in the bedroom, to the point where I just can't sleep up there because I feel like I'm choking. (Yes, I vacuum. Yes, we have filters on the air intake systems -- the expensive HEPA ones, not the cheap-ass plastic foam and cardboard filters. Doesn't matter -- we still wind up with a shitload of dust.) We have a big, high-quality HEPA air filter next to the bed, and even that doesn't really help during times like this when the temps go up and the air quality goes all to hell.

So I did a little research -- the EPA says getting a professional duct cleaning job will run anywhere from $450 to $1000 for a 3-4 bedroom house, and should last 4-6 hours. Apparently there are a lot of cleaning scams out there, so I want to make sure that what's negotiated up-front will match what we're paying for. It's a bit pricey, but the end result should be much-improved sleeping conditions for the both of us, which is always a good thing.

This is why it's no biggie

309.4 this morning. Booyah. And that's with a just-avoided migraine. Double booyah.

So I've now had my breakfast (PB sammich and 1 oz. of that lovely hatch chili con queso popcorn), and I'm packing up my clementines and heading into work. Seeya!

Begging for more

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

I had a Moment(TM) last night at the gym. As I was on the bike, merrily pedaling away (I brought the flipcam so that I could record another videocast, but there were other people in the gym so I couldn't record anything, sorry!), I was also reading Bobke II, a collection of diary entries and columns by the cheerfully insane cyclist and TDF commentator Bob Roll. If you have any interest in cycling, or simply enjoy reading great (and more than slightly gonzo) sports commentary, I highly recommend this book.

Anyhoo, there I was, reading Bobke's wit and wisdom when I stumbled across a section that pretty much sang to me. He was on a practice ride, after a year of having really shitty form, and suddenly everything clicked and he was just powering along like a machine, at which point he said, "My legs were begging for more."

And I grinned, because that's how I felt last night. My legs were sneering at me and saying, "That's all you got? Really? Really?" I did a Level 3 ride with variable inclines for forty minutes, and if it hadn't been so late I could have easily ridden for an hour or longer. All of which means I'm finally at the point where I can start stepping up my game, switching around the programs and tackling tougher rides, which is just so damn cool.

Plus my legs? Calves are starting to look damn good, people.

WEIGHT: 311.2 (slight bounce in water weight due to the salty stuff I ate yesterday -- no biggie)

FOOD FOR THE DAY: SB meal bar for breakfast, 2 pieces of chicken, greek salad, tabouleh, hummus, cauliflower and some potato chunks for lunch, and 3 clementines for dessert. Yummo! Afternoon snack of three more clementines, then dinner was two PB sammiches and 2 oz. of hatch chili con queso popcorn.

By the way

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

I know I may be boring people by posting all this food information -- feel free to skip those entries or sections. What I'm trying to do is accurately track everything that goes into my mouth, so that I can 1) take a look at it later on, 2) get an honest idea of what I've been eating, and 3) make a course correction if it looks like I'm eating too much garbage (why am I eating it, is it caused by stress, how can I rectify that situation, etc.).

So far, it seems to be working.

Slight change in plans

As I was about to fall asleep on my keyboard, I went home early and took a badly needed nap, then woke up and got the boys their Organix Indoor Feline food, then realized I was ferociously hungry, despite eating two apples and another SB bar in the afternoon. So dinner was a peanut butter sandwich on sugar-free whole wheat bread and a 1 oz. serving of this amazingly yummy hatch chili con queso popcorn I found at Whole Paycheck.

Which means the food intake in total today was:

2 SB meal bars - 420 cal
3 apples - 216 cal
1 thai chicken wrap - 610 cal
1 small caesar salad - 363 cal
1 PB sandwich - 258 cal
1 oz serving of hatch chili con queso popcorn - 110 cal

2,047 calories. A little low (seriously -- I should be eating around 2,480 calories a day right now), but adequate. I may have some yogurt when I get back from the gym, who knows.

The Fiber, the Fiber...

Since this weekend is Viva Las Vegas, I'm pulling four 10-hour days to make up for Friday (since I'm a contract stormtrooper and don't get paid if I'm not at the Death Star). And since Mellie gets hungry if she stays at work late, she had a couple of brain cells fire in the right order this morning and grabbed a bag of apples and a couple of South Beach meal bars. This way, I won't be tempted to hit the vending machines during the long stretch of this evening, plus I get at least some fiber from the fruit.

Unfortunately, I'm also extremely tired right now because it's God's Own Hairdryer in the clavicle of Texas, and that's playing merry hell with the air quality. Our buildings are air-conditioned, of course, but we also have a Level Orange Air Pollution alert right now, which means that there's various particulates in the air -- pollen, mold, fuel fumes, alien sperm, I don't know what -- that are making it seriously unpleasant to breathe. As in, I woke up last night choking and had to go downstairs and sleep on the couch, and that didn't even really help. And I wasn't the only one -- my boss said he woke up from a nightmare and pretty much went into a panic attack from feeling like he couldn't breathe, and Lyndon's eyes were bright red this morning (he brought a bottle of Visine to my cubicle and asked me to work my magic, since he can't put drops in his own eyes because they automatically slam shut at the approach of the dropper. Even I have to grab his lids and pry the damn things open to get the Visine in there).

So yeah, Mellie is a little tired today, and isn't particularly looking foward to going to the gym tonight. But a triathlon waits for no woman, so go I will (cycling and weights tonight, I think), and I'm going to bring the flipcam with me and do another video, as I may be having some new visitors to this page fairly soon.

WEIGHT: 310.8 (unsurprising, since yesterday was my rest day and I had lemon chicken and a crispy spring roll for dinner last night during FutureClassics, and then a piece of corn on the cob and a potato chip before I hit the hay).

FOOD FOR THE DAY: Since I was running out the door yet again for work, I had a South Beach meal bar for breakfast, an apple as a mid-day snack, and a thai chicken wrap and caesar salad for lunch. I'll probably have another apple or two this afternoon, and a protein shake and a couple of artichokes when I get home -- mmm.

TMI Post: Here Comes Another Special Delivery

Monday, August 2, 2010

Okay, seriously, this is going to be TMI. Bail now while you can.

Still with me? Okay -- apparently I've been getting sufficient amounts of fiber in my diet, because oh sweet mother of Cthulhu, today has been the Day of Poop. As in, I've hit the can three times already to contribute to the land mass of Texas. And we're not talking rabbit pellets here, either -- we're talking healthy, cohesive, adult-sized deposits.

I don't know if it's the fiber, or the heat (105 F at 2:00 PM. I ask you), or the biking/swimming/weightlifting, or my metabolism decided to give my GI tract a jump start, or what, but DAMN. And the volcanic gurgling coming from my midsection suggests that the DoP is not over yet.

*blink*blink*

Um, no, it's not. Gotta go -- literally.

Hitting the gym, PM Style

Over on my Facebook page, I sometimes post "It's gym time!" as I head off to Snap Fitness 24-7, usually around 10:00 PM. Last night, two people said, "You shouldn't work out this late at night -- you'll be up all night!"

Um, that may be true for other people, but for me it's not. After I've done forty minutes on the bike, plus whatever else I had that night (weights or swimming), the only thing I want to do when I get home is take a shower and do a faceplant. I know some people are energized by going to the gym -- yeah, not me. I do it because it's good for me, and it helps me go to sleep.

And to be honest, sometimes I can't get to the gym until 10:00 PM or later. Frex, yesterday was spent editing MMM, doing laundry, watering the lawn, enjoying my cheat meal at On The Border, editing the podcast, and running to the store for a stockup. By the time all that was finished, it was 11:00 PM. I'm supposed to skip a workout just because it's night time? I don't think so.

Yeah, I suppose I could have moved the workout back, but why? I like working out at night. The gym is less busy, if not totally deserted, and I can hit all the machines I need without waiting for someone else to finish. It's a safe facility so I don't feel uncomfortable being there by myself. And it's kind of peaceful to pedal away and drip sweat, kind of like a physically active meditation.

Oh, and there have been suggestions that I just work out in the morning. Uh...huh. People, have you SEEN me first thing in the morning? I'm running on the lizard brain until 9:00 AM at least -- if I hit the gym early and someone annoyed me, I'd probably wind up latching onto a limb and gnawing it off in my ire. And orange jumpsuits just clash with my hair so badly, you know?

WEIGHT: 310.8

FOOD FOR THE DAY: Breakfast was a bowl of lower-sugar oatmeal, and I just had a large cup of cut watermelon chunks as a midmorning snack. I may do a Thai wrap and a cup of cottage cheese for lunch, since dinner will be at FutureClassics and that means Chinese food.

It's Cheat Day

Sunday, August 1, 2010

And, lo, I did cheat with steak fajitas at On The Border (a handful of chips and salsa, steak and onions, sour cream, guacamole, and refried beans with melted cheese) and a luscious green tea creme drink from Legacy Books' cafe, because those things are damned good. Also had the last of the zucchini and a cob of corn for breakfast (tried to have one of the chicken breasts, but it didn't seem done enough to me and the cats were weaving around my legs giving me their piteous, "But we're HUNGRY" expressions, so I chopped it up and gave it to them).

Oh, and as of this morning I'm 311.0 exactly. *grins*

Musing over dinner

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Since breakfast was a roast beef sandwich with baked chips at Potbelly's (I was watching Theresa and Tony perform) and lunch was a peanut butter sandwich and a bowl of lower sugar oatmeal (yeah, yeah, I know about steelcut oats -- they taste like snot), I'm not hungry at the moment so this is a good time to hit the store and pick up the fixings for dinner. So -- something tasty, something healthy, but something that's not going to heat up the kitchen too badly (because it's freaking hot out there). Chicken breasts and veggies? I may well hit Whole Paycheck and pick up something I can toss on the grill.

Oh, and as of this morning -- 311.2. Whatever. Tonight is also a straight cardio night, so I may bike for 30 and then swim.

LATER: dinner was a grilled chicken breast, grilled zucchini with onions and garlic, two cobs of fresh grilled corn, and a Weight Watchers English Toffee Crunch bar. Mmm...

Drumroll, please

Friday, July 30, 2010

312.4 as of this morning. The HELL? I'm not complaining, mind you, but...the HELL? Especially since I had a PB&J sandwich for dinner, then was too damn tired to hit the gym so I just went straight to bed (and proceeded to stare at the ceiling for 5 hours because my subconscious hates me).

I don't understand my metabolism anymore, I really don't.

Breakfast was a peanut butter sandwich -- lunch was stir-fried chicken, shrimp and vegetables plus chicken fried rice at Benihana since I missed my traditional birthday lunch with Steve & Co. (plus I got a scoop of green tea ice cream as a birthday dessert).



Tea was a bag of low-butter popcorn (275 calories) because I'm stuck in the office until 8, and I'll probably have a protein shake for dinner when I get home (note to self -- remember to stop at Walmart and get more low-fat chocolate soy milk). As for the sweaty stuff, tonight will be a weightlifting night, plus 30 minutes on the bike. And dear Jesus, I'm doing a face plant the moment I get out of the shower.

Uh-huh

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Well, turned out to be the exact same weight as yesterday, so hell if I know what's happening.

Breakfast was a muffin (once again, late out the door and had to grab what I could). Lunch was roasted chicken breast, Greek salad, tsatsiki, tabouleh, some chunks of roasted potato, and a piece of pan-fried cauliflower that surprised me. The taste was really quite acceptable, kind of bland and slightly sweet. The problem is the mouth-feel -- I wasn't tempted to gag as I usually do with boiled cauliflower, but I still don't like that overly juicy cellular feel of the vegetable. That being said, I could see pureeing it and using it in a sauce or dip.

26 laps

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

After today's food fest I thought I'd go to the gym and work some of it off on the bike, then realized 1) I've already been on the bike twice this week and 2) I really needed a shower. With that in mind, I decided to do laps in the pool instead. Which turned out to be great, as the moon was perfectly placed to throw a carpet of silver across the water and made swimming eminently cool (yeah, I have pool lights -- they attract mosquitos and June bugs in the summer. Moving on--).

I'm very pleased to discover that I can now swim for 10 minutes straight, which takes up 26 laps (or 650 feet in my pool). Granted, I was panting and exhausted at the end of it, but by God I did it. So I can swim for 10 minutes, and bike for 40. Now I have to get to the point where I can do it concurrently. After that, I have to practice running for 10 minutes non-stop, then add THAT in at the end.

Fuck the scale. I felt great when I got out of the gym last night, and I feel damn good right now. The weight will come off when it comes off -- in the meantime, I'm getting stronger and more fit. (Still have to work on the food, though.)

So, food today

Breakfast -- a liver sausage sandwich on sugar-free whole wheat bread because I was hideously late and didn't have time for oatmeal.

Lunch -- a bowl of zuppa toscana, two breadsticks and three small slices of sausage pizza at Olive Garden.

Dinner -- Caesar salad, two slices of Shiner beer bread, 10 ounce steak and some fried onions.

And watch -- now that I've gorged, I'll be 313 tomorrow, because my body likes to play mindfuck games with me. Oh, and I know all this isn't very healthy -- I also don't normally eat like this.

Yeah, so much for my goal

*sigh*

314. Fourteen pounds over where I was supposed to be by today. Just fucking shoot me already.

I know I've been eating badly. Yesterday was a bowl of low-sugar oatmeal (breakfast), a Thai chicken wrap, Doritos and a cookie for lunch, a protein shake for dinner, and two tortillas, a chicken curry pocket thingy and a Weight Watchers ice cream bar because I'm under a LOT OF FUCKING STRESS THAT I CAN'T TALK ABOUT IN PUBLIC. FUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCK!

Mind you, I'm still exercising -- after last night's little pigout I went to the gym, lifted weights and rode the bike for 40 minutes. Didn't do shit, probably because of all that sugar. Just...fuck.

I've got to come up with a decent stress-reducing technique. Yoga doesn't seem to do anything. And I can no longer eat. Great. What I need is a pile of wood and an axe, or the modern equivalent.

Still alive

Monday, July 26, 2010

Arteries are all still intact. 15 minutes on the regular bike, 25 on the reclining bike. Woohoo, whatever.

Putting a pint of Blue Bell to my head, and pulling the trigger

Sunday, July 25, 2010

No, I'm not going to do that, but dear God the thought has a certain appeal. I have a massive sinus headache from the variable weather out there that meds aren't touching, various loved ones are going through incredibly stressful times and I'm worried about them, I haven't lost a damn pound since Thursday (in fact, I gained 2 -- whee!) and I feel like this is my body's way of giving me the finger for even trying to do something as insane as train for a triathlon, all of which makes I feel like I'm spinning my wheels big time and not making any forward momentum.

Which just goes to show that endorphins don't cure all of life's evils, no matter how much you wish they did. I'm just going to go to the gym and get on the damn bike anyway -- maybe it'll jack my blood pressure up enough that I'll blow out an artery. At least then I won't have to deal with this stupid headache anymore.

Video Post 02

Friday, July 23, 2010

Bounce

Thursday, July 22, 2010

In this case, up, to 310. Not unusual -- my sleep cycle has been for shit since Monday, and when I can't sleep my cortisol levels go absolutely gonzo and I swell up like the Michelin Man. Last night was the first one where I got something akin to 7 hours of sleep (interrupted once when I had to go to the bathroom -- the Black & White Idiot heard me and decided to headbutt the bedroom door for a good five minutes until he realized I wasn't letting him in) -- another night like that and my metabolism should settle down.

Nonetheless, it's annoying because it means that, barring a sudden GI virus, I won't meet my goal weight for my birthday. I really, really, REALLY wanted to be under 300 -- and yeah, I know that was kind of wishful thinking, but still. I may have to settle for being under 305, which is still damn good. I think the lowest I've been since we started using the electronic scale was 307.

Never mind. I just have to keep swimming and cycling, throwing the iron around, and eating reasonably. Things will resolve themselves in their own time, right?

A "Hee!" moment

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Many moons ago, when the world was young and Ann Coulter still roamed the plains, I learned how to juggle. It happened when I was in the chorus of "Barnum" -- the director wanted a female juggler to stand behind Charity Barnum during her big death scene and slowly juggle while she sang "The Colors of My Life". 22 measures of music, mind you. Anyway, being the attention whore that I am, I learned how to juggle for that, and have been doing it ever since.

So I have a set of juggling balls on my desk, and my boss just walked by, picked them up and tried to juggle with them. He managed one juggle (that's actually the formal term for one successful pass), then handed them back to me. I started juggling, much to the surprise of my coworkers, then dropped a ball. Without even thinking about it, I dropped into a crouch and picked it up. Dropped another ball, dropped into another crouch and got that one. It wasn't until I stood up that I realized, "Oh, wait -- I just did a butt-to-heels crouch without gasping, falling over or straining to get up."

Hee!

98.44

That's how many laps I have to do in my pool to reach 750 meters, which is the baby length of the swim section of a triathlon. Tonight, I did ten laps. Ten standard laps, mind you -- crawl style instead of my usual backstroke.

I'm still panting. Yeah, it's gonna take me six months to get up there.

Oy, lunch

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

So we have this little cafeteria at work where you can get sandwiches, wraps, burgers, and salads. The salads are kept in these little tubs -- you tell the counter person what you want, and they scoop some into a styrofoam cup (large or small, depending on your choice).

And the salads look good, I admit that. Luscious chunks of red tomato, gleaming green broccoli, purple and white onion, leafy green stuff, all of it glistening under a light coating of dressing. And then you get a cup of it, and you take it upstairs and try a forkful...and it tastes like plastic. And I don't mean, "Hmm, there's an aftertaste here" -- I'm talking, "Was this produced in China for display use only?"

Which makes obtaining lunch a bit of a challenge. I mean, sure, I could bring stuff in from home, but that would require planning and forethought and...and...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *wipes a tear away* I kill myself sometimes, I really do. The second option is to go out and forage for a decent lunch somewhere else, but since I loathe fighting crowds and usually try to eat before or after the noon rush hour, I lose my decent parking space in the lot. I may even have to park in *gasp* the satellite lot across the street. Horrors.

(Which is a problem how, my inner trainer asks, especially since it means you have to walk for a couple of extra minutes? Hey, I never said I was sensible, okay? And frankly, when I'm fresh out of the Death Star the last thing I want to do is slog an additional two minutes through God's Own Hair Dryer.)

Or I suck it up and eat the plastic. *sigh* Nobody ever said eating healthily was going to be easy.

Video Post 01

What was I thinking?

I made a very silly post on my Facebook a couple of nights ago. Someone had told me, "You rock" when I detailed how far I'd gone on the reclining bike that evening, and I blithely replied, "The goal is to be able to swim 750 meters, bike 20 kilometers, and run 5 kilometers. Why yes, I do like triathlons. :-)"

What. The. FUCK?

Where did THAT come from? I mean, yes, I actually do enjoy triathlons -- on TV. And while the idea of competing in an endurance race is interesting (if there's one thing I do damn well, it's endure), let's be perfectly honest here -- I'm a 308 lb. 44-year-old woman with flat feet and one dodgy knee. At this point in my life, I would probably throw up and then pass out within fifteen minutes of getting in the water, much less getting on a bike and running in consecutive order.

Oh, and yes, I'm putting it out there. As of this morning, I weighed 308 pounds. Granted, that's down from my all-time high of 324, and the goal is to drop below 300 before my birthday, but I digress. Where the hell did a big ol' gal like me get off saying that I wanted to compete in a triathlon? Is my subconscious trying to tell me something? Is it trying to kill me?

Of course, then the idea wouldn't leave me alone, goddamn it. Idly, because I didn't want my subconscious to think that I was serious or anything, I did a bit of Googling on triathlons in the area. Turns out that a local Life Time Fitness in Plano sponsors an indoor triathlon in February. Which would be seven months away, and the distances, well:

10-minute swim in lap pool
10-minute transition (swim to bike)
30-minute bike in cycle fitness studio
5-minute transition (bike to run)
20-minute treadmill run

Hell, I'm already doing 40 minutes on a bike (13.53 kilometers), and I've got a pool -- I can just start using a crawl instead of a backstroke to swim. The biggest, sweatiest bitch would be the running -- I have a treadmill, but I already know that would hurt like a motherfucker. And then I'd have to put it all together.

I...think I want to try this. I'd have to figure out HOW to train for it, but still, I think I want to try this, despite the whole 308 lb 44-year-old dodgy knee and flat feet thing (of course, if I DID actually train for a triathlon I suspect the 308 lbs would be a self-correcting issue). And upon doing some further Googling it seems that big broads all over the place are training for this sort of thing, so I wouldn't be totally alone.

Um. What do you think?

No bikee -- swimee!

Monday, July 19, 2010

No, I'm not dead. But there didn't seem to be any point to posting, "Got up, went into work, came home, did shit around the house, went to bed" over and over again. Yeah, it's been something of a fallow few months, but I'm back on the horse now.

Or, more accurately, bike. Yeah, I'm biking these days, kind of in honor of the Tour de France but also because it uses up more energy than just walking (and God knows me running at the moment probably wouldn't be the greatest of ideas). At the moment I'm up to 40 minutes on the bike (gym bike, not out on the roads), with an average of 8.2 miles per ride. If I can keep this up (please God), I want to take my Swedish bike into one of the local shops, get it overhauled, and see about taking it out on some of the bike paths around here once the weather gets back down into reasonable temps (aka not God's Own Hairdryer).

That being said, I decided I wasn't up to biking tonight -- so I swam 25 laps instead. Phoo, there's nothing quite like diving into a blood-warm pool.

Oh, dear God, just shoot me

Monday, March 29, 2010

Dropped another pound as of yesterday, then busted my ass cleaning the living room, rearranging furniture, then cleaning the library and dining room. "Cleaning" sounds so simple -- it doesn't encompass putting away the sheer amount of shit that gets strewn around this place, dusting every flat surface (including two ceiling fans), running to the store twice to get picture frames and cushions for the futon so that I could put on the buff cover and make it coordinate with the couch and ottoman, trying to get the treadmill through the hallway into the library (which no longer works now that we have a DVD rack there), vacuuming and then mopping the library/entranceway/dining room floor with Murphy's Oil soap, running all of the upstairs bedding through the machines, and then collapsing in an aching pile before dragging myself off to bed.

Didn't weigh myself this morning, but I don't really care -- I'm too damn tired.

Still cranky, but...

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Down another two pounds. Granted, I can see the bones in my feet again and can't press half-inch divots along my shinbone anymore so the bulk of that is water, but hey, getting rid of that much water is a GOOD thing.

Breakfast: a cup of low carb yogurt. Got to think about lunch. Shit I will be doing today because my sister and her kids are arriving on Wednesday and this place looks like Metallica has been camping out here:

  • Clean out the downstairs bathroom (vacuum and scrub floor, clean sink and mirror, scrub shower enclosure, empty and scrub out litter tray (with a different scrubber))
  • Clean kitchen (bag and bin the 15 million pounds of recyclables we have, sort out all the crap on the countertops and put it all away or throw it out, put clean dishes away, put dirty dishes in dishwasher, scrub down countertops, dust chair rail and window frames, tell Lyndon to shift his damn leather sewing machine somewhere else an clean up puddle of spilled oil underneath it, vacuum and mop/scrub floor)
  • Clean living room (sort and put away various craft projects, put away DVD boxes, move cat tree to better location, dust everything, wash sofa and futon covers, vacuum La-Z-Boy, vacuum carpet, spot-clean places where cats have hurled on the rug)

If I have time and energy after that, I may work on the side flowerbed and get that weeded. If not, I will put together the tax paperwork for delivery to the accountants on Monday.

Post-Cold, Pre-Vacation

Friday, March 26, 2010

As I have gained five pounds of water weight for reasons that mystify me (I know it's water weight because I can press divots along my shinbones from my ankles to mid-leg. Oh, and it mysteriously appeared in one day, which is physiologically impossible with anything but water), plus I'm finally getting over the cold that sandbagged me last weekend, plus many other people including my best friend are losing weight all around me, I'm officially fed up. Fed up with feeling fat and unattractive, fed up with not fitting into clothes I like, fed up with not being able to sleep comfortably, fed up with having to bring an air mattress on trips so that I can get any sleep at all, fed up with the heart hiccups and wondering if I'm flirting with a failing valve (yes, I've been to the doctor. The EKG says everything's fine, but I have to wonder) -- I'm just fucking fed up.

And so, this is day two of modified Atkins for me (modified because eating strict Atkins for lunch is impossible unless I prepare and bring my meals, and with my insane schedule these days I can't count on having time to do that). Breakfast yesterday was bacon and eggs, lunch was a chicken caesar wrap and small cup of cottage cheese, dinner was a steak, emerald kale and a strawberry smoothie made of strawberries, soy milk, cottage cheese and Splenda, plus I walked for 15 minutes last night on the treadmill. Breakfast today was a cup of low-carb yogurt with one square of exotic chocolate because I needed something to keep me from killing people on the way into work, lunch was a chicken caesar wrap and small cup of cottage cheese, and I'm thinking of a chicken stir-fry for dinner tonight as well as an upper body weight workout at the gym. I need to add more food to the schedule, but I haven't really been all that hungry as I can't TASTE anything at the moment due to the lingering effects of the cold. Oh, and my mood is in the crapper as it always is for the first week when I do this, but hey, I'm down two pounds already.

Why Atkins? Because for me it works. It doesn't for other people, and I've read the research that says low-carb and low-fat diets cause pretty much the same amount of weight loss, but carb restriction seems to work best for my already fucked up metabolism (PCOS and a low-functioning thyroid). Okay, my mood is incredibly foul (dear Lord, I had some ANGRY dreams last night, including one where Lyndon and I had to move in with my father -- he was making some really nasty cracks about Lyndon, and I just wanted to brain him), but that's a side effect of me adjusting to a lower carb intake. Once that happens, I should be golden.

In the meantime, I will probably be venting here, so you have been warned. Speaking of venting, I have so frigging much to do and so little time in which to do it. I have to clean the house this weekend before Stacy and the kids get here next Wednesday, plus get the tax paperwork done before Monday for the accountant, I still have to weed out that side flower bed, I've have not one but TWO arborists flake on me and I still need to get the frigging crepe myrtles topped, the lawn service hasn't shown up yet this year and I think I need to find someone new, and oh yeah, I'm supposed to be finishing a book right about now. Ha. Ha ha ha.

*puts head on desk and cries just a little bit*

The pool is open!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Oh, yeaaaaaaaaahhhhh. I just took the first swim of the year, and the water was goooooooorgeous. Did twenty laps, which was enough to warm up everything nicely without completely wearing me out, and the Black and White Cat sat in the window watching me splash back and forth. The only downer was that I'd forgotten to take my watch off, but it's a Timex Indiglo, and I think those are water-resistant.

Now I just have to fix the chained power outlet so that I can turn on the pool lights, and life is a good and happy place once more!

No, I'm not dead

Monday, January 4, 2010

And yes, I know I haven't been posting anything recently, mainly because there hasn't been much change in weight -- I'm still at the 15 pound loss, which is great, but I was hoping for a bit more over two months. Then again, I also wrote 3/4 of a book in November, and December was taken up with trips, getting ready for the holidays, and then spending two weeks slammed with a king god hell killer cold (this is what happens when you spend 3.5 hours in a tubular aluminum germ culture dish. Personally, I blame Stacy and Jeffrey, but I digress).

And now it is January, 2010, and I will be getting back on the diet and exercise horse with a vengeance. I won't make this a resolution because it's far too easy to break those, plus this has got to be more of a life change than just something to do for a couple of months. Tomorrow night I'm back at the gym, and I have to figure out some kind of aerobic activity that doesn't kill my bursitis. As for the diet, got to do some work on that, but bringing little minipacks of cottage cheese to work so that I can have something in the afternoon that stops me from being hungry after work and stopping off at McDonald's or Wendy's is a good thing.

Anyway, onward!